As Thanksgiving approaches, our feeds fill with messages of gratitude—family gatherings, warm meals, and appreciation for the people who carry us through life. But for many who are navigating divorce or separation, this season can feel like a sharp contrast between what was, what is, and the uncertainty of what comes next.
Yet even through the most difficult transitions, gratitude has a powerful place in the healing process.
Gratitude Doesn’t Ignore Pain — It Coexists With It
Divorce is, in many ways, a dismantling of identity, family, and future plans. It’s normal to feel grief, anger, or loneliness, especially during holidays rooted in togetherness. But gratitude does not require everything to be perfect. It simply asks us to notice what remains steady, even while so much is changing.
This Thanksgiving, gratitude might look different:
- Being thankful for resilience you didn’t know you had.
- Appreciating the friends and family who quietly check in.
- Finding peace in moments of calm, even when life feels stormy.
- Honouring your capacity to make hard decisions in pursuit of a healthier, happier future.
Reframing Traditions
For separated or blended families, holidays bring practical challenges—parenting schedules, new dynamics, empty seats at the table. It’s okay to grieve old traditions, but it’s also an opportunity to create new ones:
- A smaller, quieter dinner that focuses on conversation over perfection.
- Time outdoors, a walk, a moment of reflection—something just for you.
- Teaching children that love is not confined to one table or one gathering, but can expand across two homes.
Choosing Gratitude Amid Conflict
In family law, I often see clients caught in the chaos of litigation, hurt, and misunderstanding. But I’ve also witnessed remarkable grace—people who, despite heartbreak, choose to be thankful for:
- The years that shaped them.
- The children they are raising.
- The lessons that will guide their next chapter.
Gratitude does not justify what went wrong. It simply empowers you to carry forward what is still right.
A Thanksgiving Reminder
If this holiday feels complicated, you are not alone. Gratitude may not erase your pain, but it can soften it. It can remind you that even in seasons of endings, there is room for new beginnings.
This Thanksgiving, I invite anyone in the midst of separation to ask:
“What, in this moment, can I still give thanks for?”
It may be a small answer. But small answers, over time, rebuild lives.
Wishing you strength, peace, and gentle gratitude this holiday season.
Editorial note: This article was first published on LinkedIn in October 2025 and is republished here for reference.
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